A Cure For The School Blues

A Cure For The School Blues

Posted by Nicky J on Sep 12th 2022

For my next topic of discussion let’s look at children who like to act loud and funky in class. Are you tired of getting calls from school about your child’s unruly behavior? Is your former sweet princess now a loudmouth thirteen year old diva that curses out the teacher then walks out of class? I have a cure for this problem. Please keep in mind this is only for laughs even though I have done this. This cure will require a normal twelve inch ruler, an angry dirty look on your face, and a few days off work. “A ruler?” you ask. Yes, a ruler if you don’t have one you will normally be able to get one from the teacher.

  • First, make note of the teachers your child likes to act up with. Don’t worry, it won’t be all of them. There are many teachers that take their job seriously and do not take kindly to nonsense. Normally your child knows who they can and cannot play with.
  • Second, call up your child’s school and tell them you would like to do an observation. Make sure you ask what time your child attends, what I like to call, the act up classes. This way you can organize your surprise visit with teachers and staff.
  • Lastly, once you get all the information find a comfortable outfit that your child would hate to see you wear in public. Keep in mind this is a school so no sexy clothes. Think tacky granny wear. Why don’t we get really crazy and make sure nothing matches. Now, put on a fanny pack or a big tacky tote bag with one thousand colors and be on your merry way.

Make sure you don’t arrive as soon as the bell rings. I would suggest hiding out in the office until the tardy bell rings then take your time and tip toe into the class. Most teachers keep an empty desk in the back of the room just for observations. Once you make your grand entrance don’t flash your million dollar smile. Make sure you have a scary look on your face, so that your child will know you mean business. Get your ruler ready this is when it comes into play. Now don’t be surprised at your child’s behavior. If possible, don’t alert them of your presence right away, just sit and watch.

You will notice during your observation various things such as your child being disrespectful towards the teacher, not doing any work, and their friends eagerly participating in the foolery. After about a good five minutes, maybe less depending on your temperament, get up from your seat with ruler in hand and slam it on your child’s desk. The look on your child’s face will be priceless. Quietly growl into their ears, “Get your work done or else I’ll pop your fingers and embarrass you in front of your class.” Make sure you look like you will rain down the whole wrath of God in that class room if they don’t get themselves in gear. You will be amazed at how studious your child will become. You will enjoy their new grades, and even get some teacher compliments. Any siblings will also improve. Let’s be realistic. Who really want’s their tackily dressed mother popping them with a ruler in front of their peers? Look out for my next disciplinary action in my next blog post. I apologize for them being so sporadic. Soon they will be back on track.